Embarassing stories... The Mojo And Pohela Boishak!

Yes this is the story that you all have been waiting for, but people lets wish my friend Salman a Happy Birthday. I even made a b'day song for him!

♫happy birthday piece of shit

Your birthday gift is a pile of shit

Your ugly face looks like shit

Everything i rhyme

I rhyme it with shit!

Because.... *long golar taan*

YOU ARE A PIECE *guitar solo*

OF SHIIIIIIT! ♫

Yes I love this song and well lets continue on with the story.......

Well it was April the 14th! My favorite holiday. Pohela Boishak! It's the most festive holiday of Bangladesh, and because of the new politicians and idiotic Islamic preachers who lie and say that we all should be serious and boring people, we don't have much to celebrate and this is practically the only one where we can go all out! Well every year, people from my school go to CBFCC or something like that, its a huge place where at least a thousand people can party without worrying. Well I went there uninvited, since I left school years ago, I miss it terribly. Well anyway me and my friend were incharge of a stall, we wound up selling a lotta stuff, but we bought so many stuff to sell that we actually broke even. Oh goodie! Oh wow the "Oh goodie" thing is back! Anyway I had a lotta Mojo to drink and I think if you scroll down a bit you can know what a Mojo is.

Well the things I did were not something to be proud of, but since I am W.Azam I am proud of it. What I did first was sell fans like those poor people on the street

Me : Pankha Pankha daam beesh taka, Pankha Pankha onek pankha

Translator : 'Pankha' means fan, 'Daam' means worth, 'Beesh taka' means twenty taka and 'Pankha' can also mean cool. So in English it would sound like...

Me : Fans for sale fans for sale, twenty taka each, fans for sale fans for sale its uber cool!

That one one of the things the other things were taking as many random pictures with people as possible, that too with the absolute same expression..

Yes these are odd pictures indeed and look at my cousin's expression in the 1st photograph

Well I did a lot more things like trying to swindle my schoolmates to buying stuff in high prices!

And a lot more fun stuff like go crazy with my friends and buy drinks, non-alcoholic drinks, to all the pretty people and.... And one thing I will never be proud of...

Well I was hanging out with a few new friends and I was really high on Mojo power now because I had like 20 of them. I thought that the person next to me was a girl and I *ahem* I held her hand but then...

ta ta taaaa!

Well the girl turned out to be a dude, yes I held a dudes hand!

When I held his hand, I thought that it was the girl, but it wasn't!

I looked at her with some smirky face, well it wasn't a her was it?

Me and that guy: Aaaaaaaaaaaaaaaah!

Me : This thing never happened ok ?

Guy : Yup this never happened...

He wound up telling everybody he could....

Well to sum it up

1# I love Mojo

2# I shouldn't drink Mojo

3# But I have to drink Mojo or I'll explode

4# Try to atleast control myself while I drink Mojo

and finally

5# Never hold a dude's hand ever again

This has been Wasi from Scribbled Up! with his twenty eighth post ever

Somethings will never change!

A small peek at Tasfia's "g.σ.ℓ.в....ℓσℓ"

Heyy guys, supp? I'm good. Oh nothing *ten minutes later*. Oh nm... What are you doing ? Oh I'm doing nothing. That's how you chat don't you!

Well today lets take a sneak peak at 'g.σ.ℓ.в....ℓσℓ' a blog written by most funniest friend, and if you don't know her name by now, I will positively kill you... What happened to the font? Oh dayum it.... Well she's got one pretty neat blog... Lets see a little big of 'g.σ.ℓ.в....ℓσℓ' btw don't as for the link, or I'll kill you!I know where you live, I'm not joking, I'm serious, I'm not being lame because I'm not lying....

The following blog POST's link is right HERE

"lol...well as you can see from the title school is opening. But it's scarier than that...school is opening in just THREE DAYS!!! AAHHHH!!! *faints*....

*regains consciousness* hey everyone what's u-...why do you all look so scared??....what are you guys looking at??....why are u screaming at the calendar??...OMG school opens in 3 days!!!?? *faints again*....

*regains consciousness again*...hey everyo----

well you get the point...so yea I bet you guys are saying that...wait didn't you say you missed school in some earlier post??? :O you lied to us!!!!NOOO....*faint*"

Ok what is up with my fonts today? Maybe its the copy pasting and if your a dumb rock.. Well let me give it to you again it's right THERE and if you want something random then check it out!

Well this has been Wasi from Scribbled Up! with his twenty sixth ever blog post

Wow this is the first time he said that with this font!

Happy Friendship Day People

OK since you people miss it so much, I will tell you people again to go and read from the first blog!!

Well people it is friendship day, I have very few friends here, and very few will read this, and holiday blogs are useless because they only

last a day.... So what's the point in saying it here you may ask. Well the answer is simple... I HAVE NO LIFE AND NO PLANS FOR FRIENDSHIP DAY!!!

Yes that's the problem, I have no plans for tomorrow, maybe because I don't have a fixed friend circle, or that I'm a real butt, I really do now know!

Well anyway, Happy Friendship to everyone who read this blog, because you guys are awesome enough to read my blog, and if you do that then I see you guys as friends, good ones! And since you have the time, check out my other posts and maybe follow, and I'll follow back!

And look at these photos just for the fun!

This has been Wasi with his sixteenth ever post

He is still concerned with his spellings!

My old school friends, Alas most of them suck now!

Hello guys, I wanna tell you people that perverted guys make rather good looking girls look bad and this has happened so many times that its gotta stop, gonna make a blog about that later....

Well back to another story, today was the birthday of one of my old school friends. His name is, well if you translate it to English it comes as Mango so we will just call him Mango. Well we meet up at one of those 'private' coaching thingies and well I got to see my school friends again, people who I don't see a lot of because of the 'private' thing breaks us apart and stuff. Well I got to see my old friends again and it felt really good, but they wanted to go smoke Shisha, which you can know if you google it. Well I was not liking the idea one bit, then when we went to the lounge, the waiters didn't let them in *YAY* and they were begging to get in. But to no avail and they went to the balcony and well, they started to SMOKE!

I detest smoking! And most of my friends were smoking like hell, the ones that weren't were three guys and one girl, and later that one guy and girl started to smoke too! Well they didn't do it completely so that's good, but the many others were smoking like crazy, they sounded immature as well, WE ARE SIXTEEN AND THEY ARE MAKING SUCH A BIG DEAL ABOUT IT!

The following conversation is my friends and their enthusiasm while they smoke:

Chicken: Hey dude you made the cigarette butt wet!

Mango: Shut up Chicken

Slut: Guys I need to smoke, but there are people here, I need to smoke because I'm that desperate!

Chicken: Hey you made the cigarette gay

Random friend: What?

Chicken: Look it's bent!

Just here to show the maturity of my friends!

They are indeed very immature. I always found underage smoking a sign of immaturity,

Underage Smoker: Oh look at me, I'm six years old and i have a cigarette in my hands, its so cool doing it, I will live forever and my lungs will be just fine because I'm young and I can do anything and chicks do it too!

Yes enjoy a nice and long life Underage Smoker!

So to sum it all up

1# Smoking is bad for you and it sucks.

2# Underage smoking isn't cool because Underage Smoker died because of smoking in front of a gas pipe and dying.

3# My old school friends aren't my friends anymore because they changed...

4# Barney, the purple dinosaur, told me not to smoke and hence I don't

and finally

5# I have a fever and wish me well

This has been Wasi with his fourteenth ever post

Hope he spelt fourteenth right

My Most Embarassing Moments 1 : Its Raining Cats And Dogs, Guttermouth?

If there are readers out there, please go to the blog archive and read from the beginning for a better experience if you haven't read the first ones before, I don't

know why I keep doing this, no one reads my blogs.

Hey everybody, today sucks, yes it sucks because it is indeed raining like cats and dogs, now my question is, why do people call very torrential rain as 'cats and dogs' is it because they don't get along? And that they cause a lot of noise when they get together? Well anyway , I always found this term to be annoying. Well in this post, I will tell you one of my embarrassing moments ever. It was the first rain in the year...

Well I guess it was a Monday and I just got a new cellphone, because my old cellphone was stolen by some kids from the Madrasa, and I really wanted to talk to my girlfriend that night so I set out to get my Warid SimCard restored from the Warid Centre which is like really far away from my home. I was in the Gymnasium at the time when i decided to set off and go to the Warid Centre, still a long distance away. It was raining slightly and I was like "Hey this is gonna be easy, I'll just jog the way". Plus I played basketball at the gym so I was in a very active mood.

Well I went halfway to the Warid Centre which is right beside Rifles Square *which is a shopping mall beside the Bangladesh Rifles square or something* and it started to rain heavily, I mean more than heavier than a Sumo wrestler to a pigeon, yes that heavy. I was chanting "Teehee" to keep myself entertained because it became really cold at that time and it was kinda unbearable and saying that hypes me up. So basically it was me in shorts and a full T shirt in the rain saying "Teehee" across the street. Good thing it was raining and that no one actually noticed me doing this.

Braving the rain and the cold I made it to the Warid Centre, and I found it closed. I was upset, and i ran to the other Warid Centre which was like half a mile away, *BTW people, Warid is a GSM servicing company thingy* I was pissed.

I finally made it to the other Warid Centre, but I found that closed too. I begged the Warid people to please recover my Simcard because I don't want Madrasa children *children who live in the mosque* to toy with my cellphone and call whoever they wish to call! And they reopened the place and I got my Simcard recovered, and I asked for a towel too but they didn't give me that, to my grief.

Well it was raining a lot and I didn't want to wait that long, so I called a friend who lived nearby, Shafqat and asked him whether I can go to his house, he said that I could, by the way it was 9 P.M at the time so I needed to ask permission and that is also why the shops were closed. And it was raining a lot and I couldn't find his house when I found the street where he lives.

The rain was so heavy that I couldn't see anything with my eyes, I called Shafqat again in the rain and we said

Me: Shafqat, dude, where is your house I can't find it

Shafqat: It's the house with the black signboard, can you see it?

Me: I can't see anything man, I can't hear that much either

Shafqat: Yeah well be careful and come quickly, I'm getting wet too.

Me: What the hell man? I've been taking a nice bath in this rain for an hour now! I can you flash a light or something?

Shafqat: Yeah I'll do that!

Me: The nerve of you saying that YOUR getting wet! The nerve of some.... whoa

I trip in something and I fall to.... well.....

Gutter: Take that bitch!

Me: Oh crap!

Yes a gutter

Shafqat: Hey I see you.

He didn't say it on the phone, because the cellphone fell in the gutter, along with my legs, arms, torso and face, mouth well everything....

Shafqat: What are you doing in the gutter

Me: Oh I'm just CHILLING! NOW HELP ME FIND MY CELLPHONE!

Me: No no no no no, this can't be happening! MY CELLPHONE

I finally find the cellphone when I looked for it like a crazy person on his knees in the gutter looking for it.

Me: Can I still come to your house?

Shafqat: I don't know

I give the "please" kitty like look that I do soo well!

Shafqat: Oh OK...

After cleaning myself up at his house, the water felt so warm after the water that chilled my entire body gifted by the rain and gutter.. And saying lots of sorries to his mom, even though she was really nice about it, I went home from his car..

So to Sum it all up,

This time there is only one lesson here

1# DON'T EVER DO WHAT I DID THAT DAY! Sure I got the cellphone but it got damaged falling into the gutter, the display was broken, and later the motherboard crashed and lots of other stuff, I didn't get to talk to my girlfriend later and she broke up with me days after :(

This has been Wasi with his ninth ever post!

Will people ever read my blog?

Facebook banned me to make wallposts again!

Readers look at the bottom post and you'll know where to go before reading this post.... In other words.. look at the post beneath this one which will tell you to go to the first ever post. That is to avoid thinking that I am a total nutjob. But if you do think that I'm a total nutjob, you won't be half wrong!

OK now back to the title, you read it, if you have the brain of a dog you would still get it. If you didn't get it then your a total dumbbutt. Anyway Facebook banned me to comment on anything too so that means I'll go back to "like"ing every single post/photo I see, and everyone would ask why I am liking I am liking it and I will have no answer every time. I am so Evil! Or just a facebooker with no life! I'm not an addict! I just

use the Internet when I have nothing better to do, SO HAH!

Well Facebook banned me from doing anything that Facebook is useful for because I apparently made more than 2000 wall posts/comments which means that Facebook thinks that I am a spammer and it blocked me..... Now that is just fun! All I can do now is use applications which means i can take quizzes. And I can "like" whatever post I see. Which is kinda fun to do. But I miss out on a lot, like photos and albums and many very controversial status updates... I have no life whatsoever

The Following is some of the things that I do when Facebook bans me :

Monami Anika Fariha i hate you!

Yesterday at 11:39pm · Comment · Unlike

You and Lucretia Looks Venter like this.

Tanzim Chowdhury

hate whom ? :e

Yesterday at 11:53pm

Monami Anika Fariha

there are a few people i hate..two to three and i meant all of them..

Yesterday at 11:59pm

Tanzim Chowdhury

ohh ok :e

11 hours ago

Zintle Sigaqa

sorry hon.. i know the feeling be strong okay? mwah...

11 hours ago

Tanzim Chowdhury

whats here to like wasi ?? :O
you can also be hated by her rather being liked ...
LMAO !

11 hours ago

The "You" here is me by the way xD

And yes Tanzim PWNED me here :(

I also miss out on a lotta things like.....

Saqeb An-Noor NOwww~~I'm L-o-O-0st, wEll Noww~ I-a--a-a-a (this status requires to be sung in super high pitch)

Yesterday at 11:25pm · Comment · Unlike

You and 3 others like this.

Shibley ZarAk Khan

yo smoky smoky..

11 hours ago

Surovi Rahman

NOW IIII AM LOOO-OOOSST.. NOOOOW.. II AAAAAM. LOOOOOOOOOSSSTT!!

8 hours ago

Surovi Rahman

btw the new album is quite fine too.

8 hours ago

I wanted to know what Album it was :(

Plus i also miss out on a lotta cool photos :(

You like this.

Monami Anika Fariha

lol XD XD rehnuma's in cloud nine :P

July 22 at 9:39pm

Rehnuma Sabrin

-_- lol

but this is such a funny pic. :P
I hate you ahmed, for this. :@

Thu at 8:31pm

Monami Anika Fariha

hehe :P

Thu at 8:58pm

I so badly wanna comment here :(

It's a picture of Rehnuma eating chocoloate with her eyes all closed and just like what Monami said, she was in cloud nine .... PLZ LEMME COMMENT!!!

But it can also be a little fun too

Saraf Whatshisname My phone is accidentally locked.I tried 2 enter da password but da damn phone wouldnt unlock.SHIT!SHIT!SHIT!

about an hour ago · Comment · Unlike

You like this.

Baldy wanting to comment at Rehntuma's picture

So I decided to go to facebook and talk to him! Or her noone knows what gender Facebook really is

Me: Hey is this facebook?

Facebook: Yeah this is me

Me: I have this problem with you banning me and.....

Facebook: Kid look at this application, it's Superpoke, you can actually throw sheep at people

Me: I know about that but....

Facebook: Kid did you try playing Pet Society, your friend Monster plays it a lot!

Me: Yeah she ruined my last night with her Pet Society related problems now listen to me, I have this problem......

Facebook kept interuppting me

Facebook: You got Top Friends? Lets add eachother!

Me: This is hopeless

I was so fed up that i tried to leave

Facebook: Before you go, listen to this

Me: What is it?

Facebook: Can you help me a little on Mob Wars, it's a fun game you know..

Me: Goodbye Facebook

Facebook: Bye but remember, MySpace sucks ok?

Me: GOODBYE FACEBOOK! *angry*

I closed the 'facebook chat' chat box and started this blog

So to Sum it all up

1# Facebook is becoming more annoying day by day

2# If you want annoy my friends and their Facebook accounts PLEAE DONT!

3# I hate Mob Wars

4# Rehnuma looks cute in that photo where she eats that chocolate bar ^_^

and finally

5# I told you people to start from the earlier posts!! Nooo! Now you guys think that I'm an idiot who has no life! Noooooooo......

This has been Wasi with his fifth blog post

May Facebook annoy us less

No water, no electricity and the loud woman next door!

I assume that u read my title. Yeah totally and this all happened when it was 12 in the noon *sporting my best shades to show-off or paart as the call it in my country*. This was not fun, when I wake up, I like to be in the most happiest mood possible. If I'm not happy then I go back to sleep

which is like really fun to do when your eyes are full of sandman's gunk and your breath smells like last nights dinner, *noting if u had dinner the night before* and well what happened to me was.

When i woke up, well you can say that i was woken up, this old woman kept screaming and screaming in the living room, well I later found out that she wasn't screaming and that is the way she normally speaks and I don't like it when she comes to my house. She always wakes me up! And i also blame 'private' education for this also because I could've been in school!

Well anyway back to the topic, well the old woman woke me up, may I also say that she is a member of parliament! Just like my grandma!!! And that's why I live in the NAM flats! That is where the members of parliament live. They promise that we won't get power outs nor would we have water shortages!! Isn't that wonderfull. Especially in a country like this where power outs last longer than actual power. And for a country that is filled with rivers and such, we have shitty water supply, its free but we never get to use it

Well you must think that I am living the high life with no problems with my neccesities *correct me if my spelling is wrong* but this is Bangladesh that we are talking about. A land where promises are made, that is true, but this is also a land where people can't keep their word. "Oh goodie" I predict the reader is saying!

Back to the story, *Allah there has been too many interupptions in this story* *typo* well the woman woke me up. I called my mom and she couldn't receive the call, I am unsure even if she can receive calls from her Motorolla *advertising much* cellphone, so i called my grandma and to my surprise my mom received the phone *hurrah mother* and i told her that there's a ghetto maid lady screaming in the house and she replied that it was the member of parliament next door. I was astonished, they let maids be the memeber of parliament, or people in resemblance with them!

And so I try to go back to sleep but her voice is as loud as one of the songs i play on my Windows Media Player! And she is repetitive :

That Woman: Madam listen to me when i say this that we need water in this house, we earned it

Few seconds later

That Woman: Madam listen to me when i say this that we need water in this house, we earned it

You guessed it, another few seconds later

That Woman: Madam listen to me when i say this that we need water in this house, we earned it

Few seconds later again

That Woman: You know that birds can sing ?

Haha tricked you but she actually did say that! What's the point of that?!

So i lay defeated with my body lying on the bed *sorry for my spelling mistakes in this blog, I am just not a spelling bee, or any spelling creature on account to that* and i decide to go brush my teeth.

My senses finally came to me and I found out that the AC isn't working! Oh goodie that must mean that the power is out! So I am in a really bad mood right now... Well I really want to brush my teeth so I go to the bathroom where i know that there's gonna be water! YAY! But there's no water.

(Excuse me for a moment because the water just came back and yes it it 3 A.M right now. Time to take a bath finally!! YAY!)

(No wait False Alarm)

(No its an alarm)

(had my shower or did i ?)

This is 3 AM and i finally got the water on and i have fun showering.... well i tried

The following convo involves me, my friend and a Showercap

Shower Cap : *sprays water*

Me : Cause it's nine in the afternoon, your eyes are the size of the moon *singing the Panic! At The Disco song "Nine in the Afternoon".

The bathroom door is open and i have the WMP on!

Me: God Save the Queen *voice guitar noises* She aint a human being *singing the Sex Pistols's song "God Save the Queen"

Shower Cap : *stops spraying water*

Me: *gasps*

Shower Cap : *laughs with watery noises*

Me: *thinks for a way and decides to sing to the shower cap and that may get the water back

Shower Cap : Oh Goodie!!

Mika's song "Grace Kelly" is on in the WMP and i decide to sing to that with the Shower Cap

Me: I can be brown i can be blue I can be ........... *singing to the song*

As i sing i also make an interpretation of the song with my intrepretation of the song and dances which would be highly amusing to the eyes

Disclaimer : I am wearing clothes all the time in this scene :D

I have given up and I fall to the ground in despair when a friend calls

Friend : Heyy Wasi! Are you free ?

Me: I guess I am since I'm such a big LOSER

Friend : Oh my god what happened again ?

Me: Nothing just that the water is out and i can't take a shower. I hate my shower cap

Shower Cap : Ha Ha!

Friend : Who was that ?

Me: Oh the shower cap

Friend : Ohkay....... Wasi your wierd

Me: I just wanna take my shower, why is life so cruel to me

Friend : Calm down boy.. Now what are u doing

Me: Oh I'm just sulking at the fact that I can't take a shower

Shower Cap : Ha Ha!

Friend : So... what did u do today

Me: I half finished my second blog and some evil loud woman next door woke me up

That Evil Loud Woman : *witchy laugh*

Friend : What was that ?

Me: That lady

That Evil Loud Woman: Madam listen to me when i say this that we need water in this house, we earned it

Repetitive to the max!

Me: Someone Help me!

Friend : Wasi don't worry its all gonna be ok

Me: NO ITS NOT I WILL NEVER SHOWER AGAIN!!!!

Friend : Wasi now dont say that!

Me: I will a hundred times over!

Friend : Wasi i see that you are not in the best mood right now... I will talk to you later. Ttyl tc and goodbye

Me: Bye...

Shower Cap : Ha Ha!

Me: Shut up!

Shower Cap : *makes noises as if waters gonna come out*

Me: YAY!

Shower Cap : *no water coming out*

Me: Awwwwwww

See what i have to go through!

This has been Wasi with his second ever post

He doesn't find it funny at all -__-